These qualified persons, who got qualified crossing the qualifying marks brilliantly, have been gathered by the various Quality Gathering Committees or Groups like PSC, UPSC, Railway Recruitment Board, Educationally Qualified People’s (Users of T.T.C, BEd, MEd, NET, SET etc) User Groups, Bank Recruitment Quality Groups, Doctor (MBBS, MD, BDS etc) User Groups, Nurse User Groups, ITI User Groups, 'Microsoft Windows Learned People's' User Groups, 'Basic Lack Of Knowledge' Quality User Groups, 'Basic Lack Of Sense' Quality User Groups, 'Quality Rowdy' User Groups (The Poor & Healthy Banks' Arm Twister Groups etc are the quality examples!), 'Quality Cheaters' & Liars' User Groups (The Quality Politician Groups etc are the quality examples!) Lawyer User Groups, Judge User groups etc! The Various Quality Gathering Committees & Groups have been working overtime, since August 1947, to GATHER THE QUALITY QUALIFYIERS FROM VARIOUS QUALIFYING FIELDS to place them in the various quality departments of our democracy!
And, it worked! India became an extremely quality conscious democratic country where everything is nothing but quality in million quality forms! The nation progressed beyond any of the wildest of the imaginations Alice had in her wonderland! It was a ‘Qualified Democratic Dream’ come true! The schools, colleges, universities & the other education institutions run by the Respective Quality Governments, using the money from the quality tax payers & the expertise of the selected qualified persons, performed like a well oiled machine, belting out the quality results all over India!
Students came out of the millions of Qualified Indian Educational Institutions, night & day, qualitatively fit for the 'Indian Industries' & ‘Indian Life’, which all collected the well qualified persons from the educational institutions into its all quality embracing folds! Persons completing SSLC successfully had some chances, in the qualified earlier days, to get into Qualified Postal Department, Qualified Telecom Sector etc where quality & efficiency were of the highest order - it is the same Qualified Quality & Efficiency Indians HAVE BEEN EXPERIENCING NON STOP TILL DATE FROM THE SIDE OF THE MUCH QUALIFIED POSTAL & TELECOM DEPARTMENTS!
These qualified persons are the face of Indian Qualified Quality, even in these fast changing times! Those who qualified as teachers in the schools, colleges, universities etc performed so qualitatively that students failed to exist without the external help like Private Tuitions, Private Training, Private Guidance & Everything Private! As the education in the government educational institutions became so qualitative qualified that students were sent to the coaching/training/ tuition centres all over India, as quality was growing like anything in the qualified government educational institutions!
And, as the students have been given undiluted quality in the Government Educational Institutions (GEIs) with the quality help of The Qualified, students have been shelling out 10.3% service Tax to the service they get from the Private Training Institutions, as ‘Thanks Giving’ to the Quality & Qualification Conscious Governments! To get into any of the Quality Government Services one has to successfully get through the Government Qualifying Examinations which are Qualitatively Based on what they have learned in their respective Qualified GEIs! As the quality of GEIs are so high that in order to have the clearance in the qualifying exam one has to go to any of the private training centres available!
The quality of the GEIs are so high that people go for PRIVATE Engineering Coaching, Medical Coaching, IAS Coaching, UPSC Coaching, Bank Examination Coaching, Railway Recruitment Coaching, LLB Coaching, IIT Coaching, IIM Coaching, CAT Coaching, MAT Coaching & a million other coaching, if one really wants to be Qualified, though what will be asked in the Qualifying Examinations is ONLY THE PART OF THEIR CURRICULAM in their respective GEIs! And, what one should not forget is that as the Quality of the GEIs is always so high that no one can get qualified in the qualifying examinations & become qualified going through the exams which THEY SAY are wholesomely based on ONLY WHATS TAUGHT IN OUR QUALIFIED GEIs! And, for WHAT IS NOT TAUGHT IN THE QUALIFIED GEIs, THE STUDENTS ARE READY TO PAY A SERVICE TAX OF 10.3% + THE PRIVATE TUITION FEE, UNGRUDGINGLY, as its the duty of the parents to get their sons & daughters QUALIFIED!
If one doesn't know who M.K Gandhi is even after all the qualitatively qualified education from the GEIs one can go to a private coaching centre paying the 10.3% service tax + the training charges to have the piece of knowledge; if one doesn't know, even after all the Qualified Training from the Qualified, Mount Everest was never in India one can go to a private coaching centre paying the 10.3% service tax + the training charges to have the piece of knowledge; if you don't know, even after years of Qualified Training from the Qualified, the dungeon on the main street near your house is not Mariana Trench then you can go to a private coaching centre paying the 10.3% service tax + the training charges to have the piece of knowledge; if you don't know everyone's parents are born before their children are born you can go to a private coaching centre paying the 10.3% service tax + the training charges to have the piece of knowledge; if you don’t know human birth never happens via human anus or belly button you can go to a private coaching centre paying the 10.3% service tax + the training charges to have the piece of knowledge etc!
But, despite all these Quality Things happening the Well Qualified Teachers in all our GEIs are Spotlessly Well Qualified! The qualified police man raising an F.I.R which registers a crime as IPC 304 instead of IPC 302 or CrPc 174 instead of IPC 304 A or IPC 304 B instead of IPC 314 is one of the greatest examples of the spotless quality of the Qualified in India! The qualified judges who deliver sentences which are against the Indian Constitution, those who keep extending the cases due to the 'Lawyer Pressures', those who mechanically delivers the judgements, those who interpret law as subjectively as they feel it etc are all great examples of Our Spotless Qualified! The qualified authorities who always fail to protect the qualified common man, who always trap the qualified common man as man traps the rats in the rat traps, the qualified farmers who commit mass suicides due to a variety of reasons all over India, the qualified politicians who always make photon like faster bucks, the qualified red tape which is always lubricated with qualified greasing of the hand all over the Qualified India, the more than 70% of the Qualified Unemployable Engineering Graduates who come out of the engineering colleges every year, the millions of qualified students who come out of various GEIs inefficient, irresponsible, cock sure of anything in the universe, incompetent, self inefficient, self defeating, lethargic & insufficient in every field, the qualified doctors who come out in thousands from the qualified medical colleges, who only know how to keep a qualified patient permanently patient/treated till he goes to the Other Unqualified World etc, the qualified lawyers who come out from every nook & corner of Qualified Indian Law Colleges, who only know how to delay the judgements, how to elongate a simple case to a couple of centuries that at the least 10 generations of his or her qualified lineage get the benefit, how to post a case in a particular bench that a favourable decision can be extracted, how to prove a dog is a goat and a goat is a dog etc, the Qualified Groups named qualified trade unions etc who always do Qualified Things for themselves ONLY, the qualified scientific researchers who keep on researching till they move over & find nothing, the qualified health officials who DECLARE tea makes one healthier & coffee is poison in one moment & declare coffee the ultimate panacea for all the diseases existing in the world the very next moment etc are the greatest of the Qualified Examples we can have from a Very Qualified India!
It is a wonderful quality that the qualifying exams don’t have any bearing on or have anything to do with what the qualified have to do, after the qualification, in India! The unique opportunity is that one can qualify in sand analysis & work all one's life as a qualified preservator of wild animals; one can qualify as a school teacher or a college lecturer & spent one's whole life in Qualified Politics; one can qualify into the Indian Administrative Services & be a Qualified Political Tail Wagger all one's life; one can qualify into the police service writing some stupid examinations & the proper contacts in the proper places, as is in every other qualifying departments, and raise FIRs as one wishes & deal with any situation as one decides as the Stupid Qualifying Examination one had written, where the questions from Indian History & Secular Indian Culture were asked and some basic mathematics were done with, has Qualified him to deal with any of the Legal, Criminal, Illegal situations & things, all his life!
Hence, a forensic expert can clear a local government qualifying exam & express his or her Well Qualified Opinion on anything on Earth; the qualified forest officer can officially say what all things will happen in the world if trees were cut; a qualified medical officer can officially say what all ailments & illnesses will attack human beings in the next 200 years; a qualified politician can officially say what all debilitating problems faced by the common man will be erased from the Earth after 300 hundred years of Qualified Planning from his qualified political party; the qualified teachers can say what all qualified improvements -Ofcourse, ONLY AFTER THEY RETIRE! - should be made in the qualified curriculum etc!
IT IS TO BE NOTED THAT ONLY QUALIFIED PEOPLE CAN SAY ON ANYTHING, IN QUALIFIED INDIA & THE REST IS ABSURED & INSIGNIFICANT THAT IT SHOULD NEVER BE LISTENED TO OR THOUGTH OF EVEN! AND, ONLY QUALIFIED PEOPLE WILL BE LISTENED TO ANYWHERE IN QUALIFIED INDIA AS QUALIFICATION IS THE ONLY SINGLE CRITERION WHICH SHOULD BE FOCUSSED ON!
Indian Qualified Standards state that when someone screams the Tsunami is coming in the direction where one is standing one should find the time to zero in on a QUALIFIED TSUNAMIST in the hullabaloo & get a qualified verification certificate from him or her stating that it is a Qualified Tsunami before one runs away with one’s own life; till a ‘Nuclearly Qualified’ certifies that the people died of a nuclear disaster, the people dead can’t be considered as dead at all; till a Qualified Medical Officer attests, a death is not a death in the Qualified India; if a volcano is spewing something the Qualified Seismologists should qualitatively declare that as an eruption or else it is not an eruption at all; if the birds are flying in the sky a qualified ornithologist should vouch for that; if people are committing suicides due to poverty a Qualified Povertist should declare that; if the forests & trees are felled by the minute the Qualified Forester should declare that etc!
If a Qualified Astrologer says that one will die on reaching the age of 25, depending on the planetary conditions at one’s birth, one SHOULD DIE at that time & if the predicted one is found living even after the age of 25 he should be Qualified as dead; if Diabetes is cured by making the patients eat sugar in enough quantity by a person in Waynad district in Kerala, all the Qualified Medical Officers Of Qualified India are bound to carry out the execution of the man who actually cured thousands of Diabetes patients as what he is doing IS NEVER QUALIFIED; if a qualified village assistant does not certify one as dead, the dead man can still live, as long as he wishes, in Qualified India! If the Qualified is not saying anything then nothing is happening in Our Qualified India! And, We Should Never Forget That Without The Qualified Declaring India As India, Even India Is Not Qualified As India!
No comments:
Post a Comment