‘Thank You’ 4 Cheating, Non Performing, Killing etc!

I am used to say 'Thank You!" & almost all are! We are taught that it is polite & standard to say "Thank You!" in almost every situation! We & the generations coming up have been taught from the pre school days to 'SAY THANK YOU', almost every moment of one's life and that’s what we all have been doing all theses years & decades! Time stops for no one & this practice goes on non stop.....!

Sometimes I wonder whether I am Buddha, Jesus Christ or Gandhi as I 'SAY THANK YOU' in almost every moment of my life, as I suppose my self elevated to these great men's platform, some how! Its almost like a machine I 'SAY THANK YOU' & move on with the next thing at hand and in most of the cases I 'SAY THANK YOU', the people who got it from me never EARNED THE ‘THANK YOU’ I gave them, as they must have done ABSOLUTE NOTHING to me in the matter of quality, quantity or any other thing of existence; still I keep saying 'THANK YOU'! And, if I, out of some extreme reason, forgot to say 'THANK YOU', I feel like I DID something wrong & 'SAY THANK YOU' the very next moment and feel relieved!

HENCE, NOW I KEEP THANKING the reservation clerk at the railway station, who deals with every one rudely because 'HIS MASTER WIFE' treats him ill every day, for doing his duty of reserving a ticket, in the most awkward & rudest of the ways possible, the bus conductor who seldom gives back the change in one pretext or the other, the various service providers mushrooming all over the country who never know what service is, the teacher who never teaches my children anything as she never ever got a proper education or will have ever, the bank employees who make the easiest possible money transaction the most difficult in the world, all those wonderful people – including the very efficient & public oriented public servants, government people, pick pockets, various categories of tax men (Always worse than the cavemen!), various departments of service in private & public sector etc - who take money from my pocket without me ever knowing, the education minister who did all the sort of ruining of the entire education system, the shopkeepers who always give much less than what is paid for without me knowing ever, the postmen, who in the last 7 years, delivered letters to our address ONLY when they felt it like delivering – Which happened only a couple of times, in this short span of 7 years!-, the civil supplies minister who illegally & arbitrarily disconnected our gas connection which we have been using for the last 8 years, the men at the petrol bunks who always waste a large number of drops of the precious oil outside the petrol tank while lifting the petrol pump hurriedly from the petrol tank of the vehicle just before the completion of the flow for which one pays without fail, the hotelier who makes idlies, dosas etc that small (Ofcourse for a fortune!) that even the mighty Lilliputians marvel about their tiny sizes, the Director General cum CEO cum CFO cum Dean cum the Vice Chancellor of the gas agency which put our gas documents into the waste bin & looked in the other direction, the magnanimous service provider who frequently puts caller tunes into our mobiles & fleece us without ever asking us, the grocery shop man who always charges one or two rupee extra on the 'Indian Government Approved MRP' (Is MRP Malpractice in Retail Pricing??!), the milk man who adulterates milk with whatever comes handy, the VIP Dignitaries who always arrive, at the least, a couple of hours late, the traffic & other POLICE MEN WHO STEAL MONEY FROM ONE'S POCKETS IN THE NAME OF LAW, the repair man who repaired the undamaged part of my lap top, the hotelier who always serves the worst, sub standard & unhygienic, the government employee (who survives as a leach or a parasite on the money common man like me/you pay/s all one's life!) who ASKES FOR 'SOMETHING' TO GREASE HIS HANDS TO DO THE DUTY HE/SHE IS 'COMMONMANLY' PAID FOR, the industries which drastically pollute our living environment, the neighbour who tramples –‘Deliberately Unknowingly’!- on the plants & saplings I plant in my place & pour hot water on them that they may never grow up against HER MIGHTY WILL, the PWD department & other people friendly departments concerned which lay such beautiful roads that my vehicle (And, all other people’s vehicles, as well!) always get damaged that I get fleeced by the Greedy Repairers of the Well Registered & Well Certified  Workshops, the RTOs who, as GOD, declare “Let There Be Driving Licences 'To Kill' In Every Body's Pocket”, the doctor who ALWAYS FINDS OUT SOMETHING WHICH SHOULD BE 'THOROUGHLY' DIAGNOSED WITH ALL THE EQUIPMENTS AWAILABLE IN THE HOSPITAL HE WORKS IN OR THE CLINIC HE RUNS, the local rowdies who in the light & softened phrase of  'Eve Teasers' do whatever they wish to do, ‘the Friendly Neighbourhood Waste Dumper’ (Ofcourse and always into your piece of land & home!), the so called AC theatres, buses, trains etc where the ACs are seldom switched on, in the name of consumer/customer/commuter convenience, the Known & Unknown Great Personalities who poisonously adulterate all the food items I/we eat and all the other great men who are there in the world!

My son asked me whether ‘THANK YOU’ is something that should be given to those who have done nothing or who do things as their duty taking money out of one’s pocket?! He also suggested that if he has to say ‘THANK YOU’ to his teacher after the class the teacher should also say ‘THANK YOU’ to him that there exist some parity, as, according to his great wisdom, the teacher is teaching him taking money out of his pocket, that is his father’s pocket, which should be RIGHTLY THANKED every time he thanked the teacher! I liked his logic! Though I say ‘THANK YOU’ day in & day out, I am still unsure if this is not an extremely foolish thing that we do quite often, aping the West blindly in our culture & environment, which is a whole world different from that of the West?! Still, I know it is the ONLY WAY by which I can get myself into the league of a Buddha or Gandhi; hence, I continue saying ‘THANK YOU’!

 I came to know from very trustable sources that there are even great ‘THANK YOU’ COURSES (Most of them heavily subsidised by the various state & central governments, which always think pro poor!) where one learns to say ‘THANK YOU’ ceremoniously, in multiple styles & with great sound modulation & enthusiasm etc, in all the situations where there is NO NEED TO SAY ‘THANK YOU’ AT ALL & THAT TOO TO THE THANKLESS & SENSELESS PEOPLE FROM VARIOUS WALKS OF LIFE! In these courses they also make one master the art of saying ‘THANK YOU’ even when one is killed or murdered! Hence, we have lakhs & lakhs of great people among us who have completed these government sponsored & heavily subsidised ‘THANK YOU’ COURSES successfully, who (can) say ‘THANK YOU’ SUCCESSFULLY WITH GREAT SOUND MODULATION & DEPTH TO ‘THE DOCTORS WHO HAVE THE LICENCE TO KILL AND USE IT EFFICIENTLY’!

THESE MILLIONS OF GREAT MEN SAY ‘THANK YOU DOCTOR’ SUCCESSFULLY WITH GREATLY TRAINED STYLE & GRANDEUR - WHO MORE OFTEN THAN NOT ARE ABLE TO WAVE A LIFE OFF THE EARTH BY JUST ANOTHER FAULTY DIAGNOSIS & THE TRAINED COSTLY & AT THE SAME TIME TOTALLY INEFFECIENT REMEDIAL MEASURES AT THEIR DISPOSAL! - JUST BEFORE THEY CLOSE THEIR EYES FOR THE LAST TIME, THANKS TO THE GREAT, EXPENSIVE & AT THE SAME TIME GROSSILY ERRONEOUS & INEFFICIENT TREATMENT THEY ARE GIVEN BY THESE ‘LICENCED TO KILL’ DOCS! Ofcourse, they are no less people than the all time greats such as Buddha, Christ, Gandhi  and others & a humble me too try my level best by saying ‘THANK YOU’, right & left, night & day to get in & remain in their GREAT CIRCLE OF IMMORTALS! 

His Master’s Voice – Legally!

The man hacked  his neighbour to death and buried him under a Banyan tree; the other fellow kicked his friend out of his life and ran away for cover with police close at his heels; the fisherman kidnapped the other person's daughter, to have a kid with her as he could not give a kid to his wife; the butcher butchered the person who came to his house regularly, as he was suspicious of an illicit relationship going on between him and his wife; the man poured boiled water onto the plants his neighbour was growing, secretly in the nights, as his wife didn’t like plants & greenery on the other side of the fence; the wife arranged an exorcist to exorcise the evil in the house and the exorcist cleaned the house worth lacks of rupees and disappeared from the scene, applying  chloroform on the participants; the man stopped talking to his mother and treated her as a street wench and never greeted her as his wife was never in comfort with her mother-in-law; he started to drink regularly and come home & shout at his neighbours, from the roof tops, as his wife liked her husband bullying her hapless neighbours; he killed his paramour's husband as she (BIBI/WIFE of the killed person!) didn’t like him & wanted him to be killed!

 

All this above mentioned things happened thanks to the orders or the wishes of the all knowing & extremely logical wives of people, who were either participants or supporters of their wives’ good & educated wishes; and, all these men knew, it is Underneath Their Wives' Feet Their Heaven Lies! All this because, they perfectly understood without their wives' wishes being given, they can not breath oxygen on the surface of our mother Earth! They also understood that they have to jump into Mariana Trench unprotected if one's wife asks so or try to hit a running train off it's tracks with one's head, if one's wife demands so! One also knows that one has to fetch the flower KALYANA SOUGANDHIGAM somehow, if one's wife is bent on having one, come what may; one has the story of the MIGHTY BHIMA going to bring the same as and when asked by a very feminine Draupathi, deeply written inside one’s mind! And, not to forget, one's wife tells the story a million times a day to remind one of his DUTIES TO HER! And one is SO LOYAL to her that he never forgets it is under HER ALL KNOWING FEET HIS HEAVEN IS!

 

Hence, it came as no surprise to all these above mentioned people & the millions like them when the Apex Court declared "Bibi joh boltee hai woh suno (Listen to whatever your wife says) as otherwise it could land you in trouble. Because, if you do not listen to her, you will suffer the consequences" & "If your wife asks you to put your face that side, put it that side. If she says, put it this side, then put it this side. Otherwise you will face trouble. HUM SAB BHOGI HAIN (We are all sufferers!)".  The wives all over India welcomed whole heartedly the statement from the vacation bench & they once again made their Loyal Husbands remember that it is What They Say They have To Do & Nothing Else or Else Be Ready To Suffer As It Is Legal Now That If The Husband Do Not Follow The Order/Rule of The Wife Word by Word, It is Destined that He Suffer 24/7 & The Wife Has The Right To Make The Husband Suffer, That The Hell Itself Become Ashamed!

 

Hence, from now onwards it is legalised that one can do anything one likes to do and blame it on one's wife that even if  what is done is a serious crime, one can go scot free as & if it is the will of one's wife! All should non-sensibly execute whatever their wife or wife-to-be says and attain Nirvana! Because, according to those in the thick of the matter or we call knowledgeable people, it is unconditional, insensible & illogical subjugation to their women folk that is the secret of BLISS or NIRVANA or HEAVEN! "Yes we know it is the Ultimate Truth!” that is what each and every man says all over India! One will seriously doubt whether the Judge or Judges who proclaimed these things were saying or presenting WHAT THEIR WIVES SHOULD HAVE ASKED THEM TO SAY OR PROCLAIM, as who will SAY NO to DIVINE INTERVENTIONS and WHO CAN? And, one must know pretty well what will happen if one dare to disobey one’s JUDICIALLY UNTRAINED WIFE!! As we mortals always strive for HEAVEN & not HELL after this life, doing Poojas & saying our Prayers regularly, how can we create Hell in our lives while we are alive, as achieving BLISS or HEAVEN is as simple as dancing to the tune of one's wife!