The Signature Of The Ill Informed!

In the thousands of movies & thousands of serials we have been watching, all these decades, we have ALWAYS seen an AUTHORISED PERSON (AP!) putting down his signature, extremely emotionally & with hyper tension, on the papers given to him by the hospital staff, before an operation or surgery is going to take place, where there are no guarantees of a success……!

It is or will be written on the piece/s of paper, given to the AP, that the operation, whether major or minor, is going to be performed on the patient & whatever responsibility is there (Which means the ‘CASUALTY’ etc!) is the ‘SOLE’ responsibility of the Authorised Person (AP!) who puts his signature on the piece of paper provided & there are no responsibilities, whatsoever, to the doctor who is conducting the operation & other hospital officials, who are there ‘ONLY’ for making the AP sign the paper or papers with CASUALTY CLAUSE (CC!) printed in BOLD letters!

It is a VERY NICE MOVE (‘!!!’ mark is used in Chess to indicate ‘SUCH’ a good move!) from the doctor fraternity (Or ‘Hospital Fraternity!?) as AFTER getting the signature from the ‘AUTHORITY’ OF THE PERSON ON WHOM THE OPERATION IS GOING TO BE PERFORMED, the doctor can perform his or her duty TENSION FREE & have a crack @ the right & real problem, without seriously thinking & uselessly getting worried about the repercussions which may arise out of nothing IF, a BIG ‘if’, the operation or such similar things fail! It is ‘ALWAYS’ nice to be on the safer side of the Hospital Fence (HF!)!

BUT, the thousands & lakhs of poor signatories, all these decades, NEVER understood EXACTLY what GREAT THINGS they had all been doing! All these decades they SELDOM understood they Vouchsafed/stood guarantee for the various governments, medical colleges, medicinal industry, medical instruments, doctors, nurses & a lot of other great persons & personalities…….! And, the SIGNATORIES, even now, don’t know that they keep on doing the good & great work their previous generations had started, nonstop, guaranteeing for all the above said people who are there in their millions!

It is NEVER remembered that these signatories (APs!) are doing the selfless work of guaranteeing the SAFETY & INTEGRITY of this much of the people & their lives! It is seldom remembered that they are safe guarding more people than the personnel who guard the borders of our EVER PORUS country! And, they are standing guarantee for more people than for whose veracity the gazetted officers of India stand guarantee for! The HARDEST of the facts is that this selfless act of STANDING GUARANTEE (SG!) is ‘NEVER’ appreciated by anyone, leave alone the governments & other organizations & people who are the direct beneficiaries of SG of these selfless persons in millions!

It is heard from the ‘Trusted Sources’, who NEVER wish to be identified as they are ‘NOT’ authorised –As ARE the APs!- by anyone noteworthy, that the proposal for giving the APs the bravery awards & ‘EVEN’ Param Veer Chakras (PVCs!) has been moved by the ‘Honourable’ ‘WHO IS WHO’ of the Indian Polity! It is ALSO heard from the Trusted Sources (TSs!) that there are going to be a number of ‘online’ polling campaigns, in which anyone who spares time to post or poll an opinion will be charged by the Internet Authority (IA!) by a minimum & logical amount of Rs 10/- per second, for the time spend on the Poll OR Post Time (PT!) spent on the net, that the IA can take a decision in this matter, later!

It is NO JOKE that the APs are well considered for the President’s Gallantry Awards & EVEN the Param Veer Chakras as what these APs do is nothing short of greatest of the feats human being have EVER performed! What they stand guarantee for is nothing short of GIGANTIC!

What they stand guarantee for ARE (1) the medical educational system where more than 60% are entering the medical colleges of India to become doctors through the Behind the Door Operation (BDO!), where around $ 1.5 billion are changing hands, most of it BLACK MONEY, every year, at the least, in the last 10-12 years, (2) the innumerable medicines produced for the wholesome ‘CONSUMPTION’ –Which ARE supplied ‘OVER THE COUNTER’, ‘UNDER THE COUNTER’ , ‘IN MID AIR’ etc – in an Underdeveloped Emerging Consumer India (UECI – Pronounced ‘You See’!), (3) the greed & avarice of the ‘Hospital Companies OR Industry’ (HCI!), (4) the wholesome inefficiency, unaccountability & utter neglect of the other hospital staff ‘excluding’ the doctors – As they have ALREADY been mentioned & covered by the APs in the earlier chapters of the Guarantee Guide (GG!)!- (5) the efficiency of the inefficiency etc!      

Our various governments, @ the centre & states, have made it mandatory, over the years that to have an operation or surgery any one of the APs from the person’s side has to STAND GUARANTEE for (1) the STANDARD of medical education in India, (2) the originality & standard of the medical students in India (3) the quality & quantity of the INGREDIENTS in the medicines available in the ‘CONSUMER’ Markets (CMs!) of India , (4) the ‘SANITY’ of the persons in the medical field, (5) the free flowing & tension free family life of the persons (Medical Professionals!) involved in the process of surgery, (6) the quality of the medical equipment used in the surgery etc AS, ‘if’ the patient & the others present with him or her ‘fail’ or ‘deny’ ‘TRUSTING’ the prevailing system of medical training where the Hippocrates Oath is ceremoniously chanted @ the fag end of the passing out from the medical colleges & standing guarantee for it, who will TAKE the responsibility of those who SELDOM trust what is offered in the Hospitals cum commercial ventures?!

Then, there are welcome proposals from various quarters – The people in the know call them ‘Stake Holders’ whom everybody from the ruling governments to the sweepers of the Adivasi (Tribal!) Panchayaths SHOULD consult before taking any action! – to make the SG (Standing Guarantee!) as mandatory as the Aadhar Card has been made to (A) the train travelers who FORCE themselves into the CLOSELY PACKED ‘RESERVED’ COMPARTMENTS (CPRCs!), some of them dating back to the First Independence Struggle of India in 1857, (B) those who fly on the air planes, (C) those who travel in the badly maintained government, buses, boats & ships etc, (D) those who go for the various amusement parks in India where violations of safety laws are the order of the day, (E) those who buy heavily poisonous & adulterated food items from various market places including the well known & well advertised branded malls & all, (F) those who send their children to the various schools to get RAPED, MOLESTED, ABUSED etc (G) those who build their houses & other things, (H) those who buy various types of ‘safetyless’ vehicles from the sub standard vehicle markets of India, (I) those who breath in the heavily polluted air of Polluted India (PI!) , (J) those who use heavily polluted waters of India etc & others…..!

Let’s STRIVE for an India, where the position of a Standing Authorised Person (SAP!) IS MADE MANDATORY for one & all, for each & every purpose, matter, job etc that millions of Indians get employed as SAPs that there won’t be any FDI or Make In India option or Opening Up of Insurance, Defense & others sectors etc required to solve the EVER growing problem of unemployment in India; then, we can/will ALSO provide jobs to millions of other poor people from the African countries with these MUCH REWARDING glamorous jobs (MRGJs!) -where one Stands Guarantee to the Inefficiency, Incompetence, Falsehood, Ignorance, Arrogance etc of others whom ‘HE’ (SAP!) doesn’t have any idea about!- that we, India & Indians, eradicate poverty, starvation, malnutrition etc from the face of the Earth & be very proud of it, at the same time!