ANTONY. K. VADUKUT – MY PAPA - PART II !

Things started to change...slowly! Truck load of things, which he used @ Sharja arrived @ Cochin harbour in a couple of months after his return; but that was never to reach our home as listening to some tricky-heart melting story, he had given all those things to one of the subordinates he had in his company, almost for nothing. That shameless man came to our house one day & invited us to his house; we went there in our car and had tea with his family, as a token of his love for the things he got from My Papa! We never met him in our entire life, again! He continued with his spending & he continued helping people as immensely as he had been doing all his life. He believed the money he had earned will last for 3 generations, at the least! He helped people who asked for help & he invested money in businesses where he had little knowledge, only to help people & save them from drastic situations. As usual HE NEVER CALCULATED or LISTENED TO HIS BRAIN! He never distrusted people & was there for them whenever his help was required. But, the people as they are never were thankful to him, as they BELIEVED HIS HELP & INVESTMENT IN THEIR DISASTORUS INVESTMENT PROPOSITIONS AS THEIR BIRTH RIGHT! Most of the time he drew a blank, investing in unknown (to him!) businesses to help people! People who came, asked & had his money for almost free in their businesses cheated him day in & day out; & he continued trusting them as no man has done before! In 3 years almost all the money he had amassed had gone disappearing. His income was almost to nil. His drunkard & disloyal friends still had something or other from him...His friends & relatives too shamelessly squeezed whatever they could from him.....He continued spending the last pennies......!

All his life he had been GIVING; and he never knew or learned to ASK! People ill treated him, cheated him, tricked him right & left.....And he never complained! We, too had our problems & difficulties mounted to Himalayan proportions; My Papa was careless, as he thought there will come a way out, out of the blue.....! But that day never came! Our family struggled...struggled to no end....! As time rolled on nobody was his friend...all the tail wagers had gone into thin air...forever! With his knowledge, experience & efficiency in the managerial sector, he joined Muringur Divine Centre-A religious rehabilitation centre- near Chalakkudy in Thrissur district & involved in the activities there, as a service to the society! As is his efficiency & experience, he rose to a dignified position there, in no time. After spending around 10 or so years @ Muringur, he shifted his work ground to an orphanage in Alway, in Ernakulam district. He was playful always...made & told good jokes as well! Once, when I was on my way to pick one of my friends from the Nedumbassery air port, I saw My Papa going in the direction of Alway on a moped, the same direction I was travelling, where he was staying at that time; we crossed him @ a crowded junction and moved ahead as we were already late. But, when we reached the very next junction we got ourselves into a traffic jam due to a bus accident. As we waited there, I saw My Papa, whom we covered kilometres ago pass us on his moped and vanish in the distance as there was enough room for the moped to move on; I remembered the day I stood picking up the pebbles & lost the race, eons ago in Bombay; I thought he out ran me with his moped! I used to call him on his mobile as I am settled in Bangalore for the last 6 years....Usually, he too called me & we had good chit chat over the phone. But, sometime when I called him he would not take the call; then after some time, may be 1 hour or so, he would call me back.....then, I would not take the call....then, after 15 or 30 minutes I would call him....then he would not respond....It was some sort of a game, like Hide & Seek, I thought he was interested in.....! I voluntarily obliged to My Papa’s game!

I too didn’t fall pretty behind in the games like this; 3 & a half months back, in November 2009, I with my wife Varsha of whom he was very fond of, my sister Reena & my friend whom more than three years ago I went to pick from Nedumbassery Airport when My Papa overtook me on the moped, went to give a surprise visit to My Papa @ the orphanage @ Alway where he was spending his time. I called him up on his mobile 09744830091 & made certain that he would be there when we reach there without intimating him about our imminent arrival. But, when we arrived there he was not there; just 10 minutes ago he had gone to a nearby Ayurvedic Treatment Centre to have a body massage, which he had been undergoing for the previous 3-4 weeks. We told the priest running the orphanage to keep our arrival a secret. He arrived after 30-45 minutes & he was surprised to see all of us there unannounced. We were given food & after spending another hour or so with him we returned!

That was my last visit to Kerala....In the month of November 2009. I was completely involved in the work of the organisation I work for, Unicorns International, all these months. I travelled a lot....I met a lot of people, as usual...Some time I thought of going to Bombay with My Papa again that we could travel the Old Memory Lanes Together Again! One year back, in April or May, I even suggested this to My Papa to which he talked positively. But, the trip didn’t have taken place; hence, I occasionally thought about that. After my return from Kerala in November last, in December My Papa was hospitalised due to some problems with his kidneys. After the treatment he was brought back home to recuperate & regain his health. As Naturopathy was introduced along with Allopathic / English Medicine, he was not given his favourite food items & he was totally restrained from having His Favourite Burning Oil! He didn’t like all this.... He complained against the uselessness of the treatment without giving him his wish list of food items! He didn’t like Allopathic or Naturopathic Medicine. As he was The Man of His Heart & never his brain, he wished aloud for his favourite dishes & didn’t like to take medicine. Then, he had a scar on his left foot, due to scratching & it didn’t cure as he had Diabetes and he refused taking medicine regularly. As usual, he talked with people who came to see him with a pleasant face, as he had been doing all his life. I remember, his face was pleasant always.....in good weather & in bad...the pleasantness was always there!

On 2nd of this month (March, 2010) I was travelling on train to Kerala again. At 9.58am, sitting inside the Island Express, I selected My Papa’s mobile number 09744830091 on my mobile & pressed the call button for a second & disconnected it the very next second. I thought, I should not inform him of my coming to meet him....Sometime he might not take my call as he may play his favourite game of Hide & Seek with me. Why should I give him a surprise as he would surely be waiting for me there at home.......? In the night of March 1st he had asked My Mom to fetch his slippers that he was going, to which My Mom told something in the negative & went to take bath. But, when she came back My Papa was gone....Never to wait for My Mom to bring the slippers for him! He knew he was going; that’s why he asked for his slippers...He simply went to the other side....HE DID WHAT HIS HEART TOLD HIM.......He never listened to others & his brain and when he felt like doing something, HE DID THAT...ONLY LISTENING TO HIS HEART! He walked from this life to another one wearing no slippers, with a pleasant face, registering complaints against no one & listening only to his heart, that too A REALLY RARE & BIG ONE! But, he forgot to take his calculator with him as he went walking with no slippers on, as I found out when I reached home; it was placed forgotten on my cot, in my room; of course, of what use it had been for him in his life? Hence, it can be that My Papa might have left it on my cot deliberately.

When I reached home he was lying down in the coffin, waiting for me .........his eldest son with whom he played games of various sorts....in time....I thought this one another game of sorts he invented to surprise all....After a couple of minutes of my arrival the coffin was lifted & I held the coffin on the right side of My Papa’s head....the face was pleasant as usual....He lied there well dressed with shoes on, no slippers. He weighed quite a lot & we were 8 persons who carried the coffin & only I understood that it was the weight of his REALLY BIG HEART. Then we reached the parish church & after the rituals inside the church went to the grave yard for the LAST PART OF MY PAPA’s MORTAL JOURNEY. The coffin was lowered near his grave & then the lid of the coffin was closed & the coffin was lowered into the grave & the grave was closed. My Papa -Not My Papa whom I knew- was there inside the grave but My Papa I knew, I realised, was somewhere around.....He might ring me up from somewhere someday to plan about our much delayed journey together to the Memory Lanes of Bombay... I realise, when the next time I go to the airport @ Nedumbassery I might see My Papa overtaking me on his moped... I know, when & if we go to the orphanage he spent his time @ Alway again, we will be told that My Papa has gone outside just now and will return soon, to be surprised by our visit. And, when he fails to pick up my call on his mobile 09744830091, I know pretty well that he is playing his usual games with me, as My Papa had been all my life and he will ring me up after some time.....!

THE EXPERTS OF THE WORLD!

When I was young I could make out those things that were beautiful from that were not! I seldom made a mistake. My friends of the same age too had this brilliant capacity to identify any beautiful thing with their naked eyes! In those days there were no complications. I think it was a very simple era. It was a very straight forward, very non intricate & very normal era. In those days when we said the flower was beautiful, without any confusion there stood a beautiful flower with nobody contesting otherwise...If someone said there was a beautiful girl near his house we always found a beautiful girl there....If somebody those days said they went to a beautiful picnic place everybody understood that they went to a beautiful picnic place...yes ...everything was as simple & understandable as that. And, no one in those days said there lived a very beautiful girl next to his house & found out a cinder wench when one really met her.


But all that changed quite some time ago! As some one stated much earlier, the time of the specialists came! And whenever someone wanted to comment on anything he or she always withheld the comment till he or she found an expert and got his or her opinion! Today, nobody dares to utter even a word about anything without consulting an expert & it became a rule that without an expert's advice even a hen can not be called a hen &a bullock a bullock! The time has changed & it is the era of the so called experts without whom the life has become meaningless and utter waste! Hence, this era has got the tag "the expert era” or “the age of the experts!” What is interesting in this era is that without these experts here, the things are not the things they seem & feel to be! Without these experts nothing is what they are taught or presented to be. Its experts all the way...here ....there & everywhere.....!

Now, everything stands changed... A rose is not beautiful & a rose is not a rose at all if the expert says otherwise; a butterfly is not beautiful if the expert says otherwise; a light-tinted cloud & the rainbow are not beautiful if the expert says otherwise! One is forced to become aware of the all powerful existence of the expert in any field & every field. One become owe-struck when there is an expert present. When Dr.Faustus brings back Helen of Troy from the nether world we wonder whether to exclaim her as beautiful, goddess like etc in the all consuming presence of the expert. If he says ok it is wonderful-aloud for all of us common folk! When on sees the mighty Himalayas one looks around cautiously to check whether there is an expert around, before exclaiming in wonderful delight! All it takes to proclaim the pyramids wonderful is an expert's opinion; and, take note you are not entitled to comment without getting the comment of the expert first!


When Susmitha Sen, Aiswarya Rai & others became beauty queens in the bygone era the people understood that they were beautiful; people could see & appreciate their beauty without the expert breathing down one's neck! When Padmini, Vijayanthimala, Hemamalini & others scorched the silver screens we were in a position to understand they were beauties of their time, and, of course, without the interference of the experts! All those things are past now. When the beauty queens-selected of today walk before us we doubt from which angle their beauty is seen or rather FOUND OUT?! What sort of an expert would he be who selected this apparition as beauty queen, we-common people- often pose the question. The expert claims that it is the angle of her jaw & the squint in her eyes & her social inferior standing & a million undecipherable oddities & eccentricities that are the qualities which made her beauty queen! Now the common man understands painfully that the BEAUTY IS NO MORE BEAUTY BUT STATISTICS & EXPERTS! And, statistics can be used to prove anything right or wrong anytime or with statistics one can prove anything!


Hence, one should be prepared to appreciate a handicapped, half-burned faced cinder wench as the beauty queen as the crown is for her deformity & the pathetic state she is in & HER COURAGE TO FIGHT THE ODDITIES IN HER LIFE! That is right according to the expert panel as THE BEST CLIMBER AWARD SHOULD BE GIVEN TO SOME ONE WHO LOST HIS LEGS WHILE CLIMBING A TREE TO RESPECT HIS COURAGE TO MOVE ON IN HIS LIFE. THE BEST SINGER AWARD SHOULD BE GIVEN TO THOSE WHO GET MAXIMUM NUMBER OF Rs 6/- SMSs & SOUND LIKE A BUFFALLO, as the criterion is the fighting spirit & courage they show to sing before an audience, despite having a very low class voice! Hence, we should bear that skinny, anorexic, ghostly looking, scantly-clad calendar girls the experts say beautiful a little more; hence, we should be prepared to eulogise those models that are not better than beggars, as they are highly praised & appreciated as beauties by our dear experts! We should all join courses that teach us how to appreciate beauty even where there is not even an iota of it! Hence, I didn’t find it difficult to understand & awkward when I saw someone staring at a barren rock, in the middle of a desert & exclaim aloud it was the most beautiful thing in the world, as I saw an expert whispering something in his ears!

OH MY GOD.......IT’S AS SIMPLE AS THAT!

God was or is ‘always’ equal to the level of thought or brain power or logic of the person who thinks of God! That’s why men always have a ‘logical and straightforward god’ and females an ‘emotional and inconsistent god’ who will always support (that’s how people think god will respond to their (good) actions in real life, and people ‘Only’ do good actions in their lives, as to them only those actions are good and because of that ‘God’s Actions’ or the actions which will get the approval of the God automatically as they are good and God stands for whatever that is good) the actions they take/do in their lives-males doing/ going for logical, consistent, straight forward and fact based actions & females less logical, less factual, inconsistent, emotion based- therefore groundless- and round about way of actions!

God always reflects the mind of the thinker of God or else ‘God is just a reflection of a human mind’. Or we can rather say that god was or is always equal to the society or world, which is populated by males and females, existed/ existing at any given point of time! And then the most surprising or shocking matter is that as per the things stated God is Man or Man is God!!!

Hence, god Mona Sing thought what god Akshay did was not right and goddess Rekha thought it was great stupidity god Amartya Mishra was doing and so on.....! And the god running the tea shop, Vadivel Muthu gave very less quality and quantity to the 10 rupee he charged for the cup of coffee from the customer god Balu and the bus conductor god Raju Sudhanpet pretended to be oblivious of the change he had to give back to the commuter god Jalappa Reddy and the teacher god Amareesh.K. never taught his student gods Prakruti Misra, Saakeeth Krishnamurthy, Sangeeth Malhotra and others as he was sure to be get paid by the educational institution he (the teacher god) is working for, for ‘not taking classes!’ Oh My God or Oh My Man?!

Please Note: This Article Was Written 2 Years Ago!

WAITING FOR MY NOBEL!

Of late, I see millions of people, all over the world, talking, dreaming, preparing for, thinking & doing a million things about Nobel Prize! It has never happened that a storm the Nobel Prize created caught millions unawares & got them involved too! These days, people jump awake from their dreams thinking they got a Nobel; Children cry for a Nobel; Petty Politicians prepare themselves & attend classes for a Nobel, conducted by hundreds of fly-by-night course-conductors! A million activities are now run, focused on Nobel Prize these days!

It is interesting to see people from all walks of life getting drowned in this Nobel-Rush! People, who sit idle PEACEFULLY, doing nothing, say “THEY HAVE A CLAIM ON THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE! People from the Indian state Kerala, with all their trade unions & groups of idle-workers and most of the people, who while their whole time away 24/7, DOING NOTHING, scream at the top of their voice, united, that IT IS THEIR BIRTH RIGHT TO HAVE THE NOBEL PEACE PRIZE [as the union-workers or workers’ unions of Kerala are ACCUSTOMED/ILLEGALY-LEGALISED to have ‘THE NOKKU COOLIE’ -PAYMENT FOR JUST WATCHING (OR IN OTHER BEAUTIFUL WORDS ‘PEACEFULLY DOING NOTHING!’) SOMEONE ELSE DOING THE WORK WHICH IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE BIRTH RIGHT OF SOME PARTICULAR WORKER-UNIONS!], as they WASTE THEIR ENTIRE LIFE SITTING IDLE/PEACEFULLY!

Now, in the adoption markets, the babies who don’t ever cry or make a sound have a hefty premium to be paid to the adoption specialists, as who knows when will the NOBEL PEACE PRIZE GOD’S CALL WILL COME?!; and the parents of those children who don’t even make a noise even after two or three years after the birth are extremely happy as they think the hitherto called disability is a golden chance to get a NOBEL PEACE PRIZE, as their kids seldom make a noise TO DISTURB PEACE! Hence, “The crying baby gets milk!” got royally replaced by “It is the non-crying baby gets the Nobel Peace Prize!”

Extremely inactive persons including Members of Parliaments, Ministers, Rulers, Governors, Councillors, Presidents of all sorts, including those of the local tea clubs, coffee clubs, cricket clubs, fishermen’s clubs, smokers’ clubs, idiots’ clubs, Paupers’ Union Leaders and a variety of Utterly Inactive People have gate-crashed into the local Nobel Committee Offices all over the world & Swedish Nobel Committee Office, with the attested copies of their total inactivity, testifying their WHOLESOME INACTIVITY -read contribution towards WORLD PEACE! - from the active world organisations like WHO, Green Peace, Red Cross, Unicorns International & others; it is also heard that some of these most inactive persons submitted forged/fake documents as their PROOF OF TOTAL INACTIVITTY!

Most of the completely inactive institutions like schools, colleges, universities, government departments & others who do little despite having the responsibility to do great things to upgrade human thought, existence & life also staked their claims to the Nobel Peace Prize, most ardently & feverishly! Those people who PROMOTE & PROPAGATE GLOBAL TERRORISM PEACEFULLY also claimed THEIR POUND OF NOBEL FLESH! The near & dear of those people who PASSED AWAY PEACEFULLY claimed their Nobel Peace Prize, dutifully! It is also heard that the kith & kin of those persons who passed away a couple of decades & even centuries ago have CLAIMED THE NOBEL POSTHUMOSLY, citing the PEACEFULL NATURE THE PASSED AWAY PEOPLE ARE IN THE PRESENT & THEIR CONTRIBUTION IN THE MATTER OF WORLD PEACE! There are even people who claim and lobby heavily & passionately for THOSE PEACEFULL VOLCANOES WHICH ARE NOT ACTIVE and hence very much eligible for the Nobel Prize for Peace!

“OH MY GOD.... OBAMA HAS A NOBEL..... CAN I HAVE ONE, PLEASE??!” has become a frequently recurring question world wide! Now people & all those in the know will try to make one convinced that Nobel Peace Prize will make Obama do great things for humanity! Yea, they can be right......Who can firmly assert A NOBEL WILL NOT FORCE THE PRESIDENT TO DO GREAT THINGS?!! Hence, I think, in the next Nobel committee, there will surely be a black sorcerer, a fortune teller & an oracle to find out the man who will do great things, given he is gifted with a Nobel, far in advance to a supposed action worth a Nobel! And, in the coming years we will definitely find an unborn child getting a Nobel for chemistry, physics or any other Nobel subject, for an invention or discovery he/she may do/make one day in the near future 2077!

MALAYALI - THE ENLIGHTENED KERALITE!

Secular India's one & only religiously created district is in Kerala, and that too happened way back in 1967! An Extremely Inactive Opposition Party & A Hyper Active Ruling Party are some of the special things the state offers! Ardent Opposition & Feverish No to Tractor, Computer, Pre-Degree Board, Smart City, Express High Way etc. first & then Fervent Implementation of the same by the same people who opposed it tooth & nail has been written in golden letters in Kerala History!

Universities where ONLY DIRTY POLITICTS IS TAUGHT & MADE IMBIBED FORCEFULLY 24/7 are Kerala Specialities! At Kerala Places like Parambikulam, Mullapperiyar etc. respective governments of Kerala always waited for the permission from their GOOD FRIEND Tamilnadu to come 24/7 even for removing a bag of sand from the dam sites they own! And, vehicles from Kerala continue to enter Kerala's own Parambikulam via Tamilnadu, paying taxes to Tamilnadu to enter Kerala’s own land! Water from Kerala dams is unobtrusively & slyly channelized to Tamilnadu, all these years, with the knowledge & tacit support of the respective governments- Inaction that is the ENLIGHTENED MOTTO!

Extremely Inactive and Idle group of people who depend on others outside God's Own Country for everything, including vegetables & food items, NEVER EVER USING hundreds of thousands of hectors of very fertile land is another Kerala Special! Wastefully consuming water, earth & forest and giving back nothing to Nature, finding no time even to plant a tree, but finding more than enough time to fell a number of trees just for fun, Enlightened Malayalees gleefully move on! It is a place where LEACHEROUS CONSUMPTION is an extremely favourite past time and WORK IS SITTING IDLE & IDLENESS RELIGION! Irresponsible Education System developed exclusively by the Enlightened People of God’s Own Country, where, once, EVEN POLICE PERSONNEL EVALUATED ANSWER SHEETS OF COLLEGE STUDENTS, & recovered hundreds of answer sheets of Highly Unfortunate Students from the water tanks of A Particular University months after the evaluation of Star Crossed Students got finished and the results declared -1986 to be specific!-, is nothing but Kerala Model Enlightenment!

Kerala Is God’s Own Country Where Adulteration & Selling spurious & duplicate things are a fad; it is a place where government employees behave as these were Good Old Royal Days & They Are True Royal Blood; it is where red-tapism is a celebrated virtue & of course IDLENESS THE NATURE! It is also Hartal /Bandh’s Own Country Where a Couple of Illegal Bandhs & Hartals (Name Changed to escape The All Seeing Eyes of Indian Courts) a week is a part of anything existing in Kerala! It is where for under 5 hours of lazy-work people charge a very low daily wage of 300-400 Indian rupees, where these 5 hours are spent to paint only ONE SIDE OF A WINDOW PANE, hence making it Lazy Workers’ Own Country! It is a great place where AC theatres seldom switch ACs on after charging for AC!

It is a good place where Enlightened Boot Lickers ascend ‘the Future Moulding Institutions’ like Schools, Colleges etc, where quality is a PIOUS WORD of which's Meaning Nobody knows & people in the TOTAL LACK OF KNOWLEDGE take decisions of extreme significance; and it is a place where the Enlightened Ones don’t even know a THING CALLED TIME exists! It is a happening place where Every Happening Is An Accident! Here is the place where policy makers are WELL -UN-AWARE OF what they are doing! Here the Enlightened Ones talk KILOMETRES & KILOGRAMS ABOUT NOTHING! It is a place where all types of scandals, tricks, swindles, cheating and the likes are played out every second & LIFE IS LIVED ACCORDING TO SOME STUPID'S FOOLISH IDEOLOGY! It is a great place where the Mother Tongue is LOOKED DOWN UPON & A GATHERING OF TWO ENLIGHTENED MALAYALEES IS THE WORLD PARLIAMENT OF UNNECESSARY, INSIGNIFICANT, NEVER ENDING & USELESS DEBATE & ARGUMENT!

It is a wonderful happening place where neighbours pour boiled water onto the planted saplings of the neighbour's plants & accuse the demons of night [Particularly the poor Marutha-A Form of Evil Spirit, Njavanengadan-Another Form of Very Local Evil Spirit, Kozhiyum Makkalum (Hen & Chicks - The other form of a Local Deity!), Thervazhca & company] for the sudden decaying & demise of the sapling! Here we see & meet millions of Enlightened Minds/Mindsets Which Never See or Appreciate Quality in Any Form-Here Quality Is Kicked Out As Evil! It is a land of Enlightened Ones Where Mediocrity & Banality are the topics of most of the modern day ballad and creativity is almost dead & work ethics totally destroyed! It is the only place on our mother Earth where PEOPLE ARE EXTREMELY BUSY DOING NOTHING & life is the very basics of a human life like FOOD, SHELTER, CLOTHING & A LOT OF GAS!

THE MALAYALI OUTSIDE GOD’S OWN COUNTRY!
The Malayali Outside is some what different; there, he/she is an extremely well-made & efficient creature, well known for his/her education, knowledge & culture! Nobody looks beyond this peripheral beauty of Malayali! The selfish giant that he/she is, will impose upon anyone who is ready to be imposed upon & start the work of sucking off the sap of the imposed one till that point where the imposed one is not in a state of any use to the imposter; then, he/she moves to another hapless creature, to impose on him/her. He/she feigns knowledge, culture & education even in the fields where he/she doesn’t know even the ABCDs!

She will claim that it is because some one switched on the mixer grinder or an iron box one & a half kilometre from where she stands, the power has gone in their locality & the strongest of acids is human urine, which will definitely find some takers, due to the HEARD-KNOWLEDGE of the MALAYALEES! In the case of living in separate houses, it is always better TWO MALAYALEES live at the least with another one – anyone other than a Malayali- between their houses, lest that locality will never see peace again!

She will use water wastefully, as they are used to in their God’s Own Country, and pretend to he very highly conscious of Cleanliness & Hygiene, despite being extremely poor about these two very important things! She will take bath twice a day & remain unclean most of the day. She seldom uses her hand kerchief & uses some other means to wipe off her running nose! She/he talks aloud about the incompetence the Malayalees have in the matter of English Language & make parodies mocking them; he/she learns to MIMICK a couple of words in English & parrot English in unnecessary places & in awkward situations like where there are no English Speakers! If another Malayali (Trying hard To Become An Enlightened One), who is low in confidence, as far as Spoken English is concerned, speaks or asks something in Malayalam to One of the Enlightened Ones, he/she will pretend that he/she is from America & Speak Chinese English with strong Sinhalese Accent, which no one in the world can understand!

And, it is a pleasure & pain, at the same time, to watch this Great Selfish-Malayali Outside God’s Own Country of Yore move forward, helping no one but oneself, losing a lot and gaining only a trifle in the matter of Real Education, that is LIFE!

THE GODS OF THEIR OWN COUNTRY!

The tragedy occurred in Thekkady, Kerala, in which 45 tourists lost their lives has been be- mourned by thousands all over India. A hasty enquiry into the incident has been initiated. News papers printed out whatever they considered right; news channels made it a sort of celebration. The official version, as always lacking in quality & clarity, tried to blame the tragedy on a couple of people and washed their hands as usual. The people lost their lives never uttered a word of complaint & they never said HOW HAPPY THEY WERE WHEN THE TRAGEDY TOOK THIER SOULS!

The inefficiency of the driver of the boat, the improper design & construction of the ill fated boat, the inefficiency & neglect from the part of the forest guard on the boarding point, the senselessness of the tourists who moved swiftly onto a side of the ill fated boat when they sighted a herd of elephants & a million other THEORIES OF PROBABILITY were circulated & discussed day and night. The person who gave the fitness certificate to the boat came again to inspect the boat after the tragedy & gave it another fitness certificate of perfection. The farce continued with at the least the people of Kerala watching with bated breath.

What people forget is that THE TRAGEDY WAS WAITING TO HAPPEN IN THEKKADY, all these years! And, SUCH TRAGEDIES ARE WAITING TO HAPPEN IN MOST OF THE TOURIST SPOTS IN KERALA! And, people forget this fact too that it is the SHEER LUCK OF THE TOURISTS WHICH SAVE THEIR LIVES DAY IN & DAY OUT IN MOST OF THE TOURIST SPOTS OF KERALA!
When KNOWLEDGE, EFFICIENCY, DEDICATION, STRICT COMPLIANCE TO THE SAFETY STANDARDS & MEASURES, PROPER IMPLEMENTATION OF THE RULES & REGULATIONS, STRICT ADHERENCE TO THE RULES & REGULATIONS & PROPER GUIDANCE have to be the corner stones of ANY QUALITY TOURIST FACILITY OR SPOT , excluding these very things, one will find everything else in OUR GOD’S OWN COUNTRY, KERALA!

When Thattekkad (in Kerala) Boat Tragedy mitigated 18 innocent lives of hapless school children, there too we had enquiry missions & fault finders galore! But, none could give back the precious lives lost. Instead, we got another number of enquiry & inquiry reports. There too we had culprits & irresponsible people in large numbers. But, in a month or so all that happened in Thattekkad was completely forgotten and ALL PATIENTLY WAITED FOR ANOTHER TRAGEDY TO HAPPEN, DUE TO INEFFECIENCY, TILL THEKKADY HAPPENED!

When tourists go for boating all they expect & wish for is enjoyment with 100% safety to their being. But, what is offered is 100% enjoyment without any guarantee provided for one’s safety or life! IN THE TOURIST SPOTS/PLACES OF GOD’S OWN COUNTRY KERALA, THE OFFICIALS ARE THE GODS! What they do or utter is the ULTIMATE TRUTH & WISDOM; the rest is rubbish! In the category of officials, all from the sweeper to the manager are included! When a driver of a tourist department cab (carrying tourists to Rajamala-Munnar) & his chamchas think it is not worthy to stop where there is a water fall, as he is busy to finish the trip as early as possible that he can go to the cinema with his girl friend, he will stop the cab due to the pressure from the passengers -read tourists- for a second or to & then THREATENING THAT HEAVEY BOULDOURS WILL FALL FROM THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN (ANAMALAI) start the cab & leave the place immediately, making the tourists sitting idiots!

When the tourists in the Silent Valley National Park, Palakkad, Kerala start to enjoy the wonderful beauty of the setting sun from the top of the Watch-Tower (Around 5 in the evening!), FROM THE HEAVENS THE GOD - the driver of the forest department vehicle or the qualified guide provided ( the sweeper or a rubber tapper provided from the OFFICE OF THE GODS at the starting point ) from the starting point – for which we have to pay 150/- bucks - THUNDERS THAT it is time to go back as at 7pm we have to be at the staring point as the GUARD GOD at the entry point (1hour downward from the watch-tower) has to run an errand for his drunken friend! In most of the days, at the OFFICE OF THE GODS, the GODS will be busy with MAKING THEMSELVES BUSY THAT NOTHING WORK PROPERLY! WE OFTEN SEE THE GODS MOVING HERE & THERE LIKE LIGHTNING INSIDE THE OFFICE OF THE GODS & ORDINARY MORTALS WAITING THE GODS TO HAVE A PASS TO ENTER THE PARADISE WITH AN AUTHORISED & AUTHORITATIVE GUIDE, WHO IS THE WISDOM PERSONIFIED!

At Parambikulam, Sholayar, Athirappilli & Vazhachal Water Falls and a lot of other tourist spots TOURISTS GO TO ENJOY AT THEIR OWN RISK & PERIL! In most of the tourist places in Kerala, THE SECURITY & SAFETY OF THE TOURIST IS THE LEAST CONSIDERED FACTOR! Everywhere THE TOURIST AUTHORITY GODS (officials = the sweeper to the manager) KEEP DOING WHAT THEY HAVE BEEN DOING ALL THESE YEARS......THAT IS DOING NOTHING! When something tragic happens, THE GODS ENGAGE THEMSELVES IN THE GAME OF “BUCK PASSING” till the tragedy is forgotten!

The tourists seldom remember/think that KERALA IS A PLACE WHERE TORNAEDOS CAN THROW A TRAIN OUT OF ITS TRACK & TAKE A HUNDRED LIVES, COMING FROM NOWHERE! And, they never will know that MOST OF THE BOATS WITH THE TOURISM DEPARTMENT, IF EXAMINED PROPERLY, WILL HAVE ONE FATAL FLAW OR ANOTHER, WHICH WILL COME TO THE PUBLIC KNOWLEDGE ONLY WHEN THERE HAPPENES A TRAGEDY LIKE THAT ONE HAPPENED AT THATTEKKAD OR THEKKADY! And they will never understand that in Kerala (as is in most parts of our dear country India) THE RESCUE OPERATION IS THE COLLECTION OF THE DEAD BODIES, hours after a tragedy strikes! And, the poor tourists will never know that KERALA IS A STATE, WHICH SITS IT’S HANDS VOLUNTARILY TIED IN FRONT, DOING NOTHING ON A VERY DANGEROUS TIME BOMB NAMED MULLAPPERIYAR DAM (Near Which the Thekkady Tragedy occurred!), which can just erase 3 or 4 districts of Kerala in no time, if collapsed! What is known for sure is that the thrifty Keralite will rise as a phoenix from any disaster and move forward in THE TRUST & BELIEF THAT NOTHING TRAGIC WILL HAPPEN........ AGAIN!!!

Irresponsibility Thy Name Is Indian!

Way back, in the very first part of the eighties when Union Carbide in Bhopal killed hundreds of people and damaged thousands of lives, condolences poured in from various parts of the world; only condolences came in truck loads, nothing else! People were left alone to fight against the multinational company on their own with their extremely meagre resources and after a decade or so they got droplets of money for the lives lost and the great suffering they had and the war they waged all those years, whipping out what they had earned in their entire life time! For the company & the powers that be it was nothing but just an accident; nothing more than that! It could have been an extremely different story if this same thing had happened in any of the so called developed countries!

When the answer sheets of a group of students who appeared for their degree exams disappeared into thin air -so it is told!- and they were frequenting the corridors of the university a million times to have their problem rectified that they can move forward, no living soul in the university was in the know of the things and no one was responsible for their disappeared answer papers; the students visited the university premises daily as if it was their uncle's house! Everyday they went into the university premises their University Uncle told them to come the very next day as to get their problem solved; it took only a couple of weeks for these hapless students to learn that the University Uncle was well versed in Puranas as Lord Ganapathi learned his father's (Lord Shiva) written promise that "Your Marriage Will Be Solemnised TOMMORROW!" is never going to be fulfilled as the written promise says his marriage will be solemnised TOMMORROW and each day he went to his father carrying this written promise, his father will read aloud the written promise he had given to his son and ask him to come TOMMORROW, as it was when, in the WRITTEN PROMISE, Lord Ganapathi's marriage was PROMISED TO BE SOLMENISED!

The man who had an operation to be performed on his left thigh went into the operation theatre fully loaded and came back with one of his kidneys removed and his right eye operated upon for the removal of (a non-existent!) cataract! The hospital termed it just a mistake after the man complained about some urinal & eye problems and visited another hospital, after a month or so after the operation, to find out to his utter shock that he was robbed of his kidney and his eye sight may never return! The hospital then termed it as a Simple Mistake by which the doctor who operated upon him took him for another patient and did what was to be for "The Other Patient!" After all, according to the hospital, the operation was successful and the charge they squeezed out of the patient for the wrong operation too was quite agreeable! And, according to the hospital sources, a person can comfortably live with one kidney; and living with a kidney-less is not going to have any impact on the patient! And the Very Considerate & Good Samaritan Hospital gave him a Booklet Free in a well attended & well publicised ceremony which had a humanitarian title which read "Living With A Single Kidney With The Other One Lost In An Accidental Operation!"

When the train, scheduled to arrive at 8.30 in the evening, arrived one & a half hours late, little did he know that the EFFICIENCY & SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY of Somebody in the Indian Railways, who "Thoroughly Calculated To Delay Signal For His Particular Train, A Couple Of Times", would cost him his life, as he was shot dead in the middle of the city "BY SOME UNIDENTIFIED PEOPLE", who presumed in his bag he was carrying something very valuable, where actually was a couple of his dress & a couple of magazines & books! Making passengers get down at the stations, at UNSAFE HOURS, when the arrival time is scheduled & announced to be SAFE HOURS, is never considered to be a problem of any serious nature. The death of that passenger & the like things can not & never should be blamed on the train arriving late, the well calculating signal men, the lack of security for the common people and the other sorts of things that are too common to be mentioned! After all how can one BLAME THE KILLING OUTSIDE THE RAILWAY PREMISES IN BANGALORE ON THE WELL INTENDED & WELL CALCULATING & HUGELY EFFICIENT SIGNAL MAN AT THE COIMBATORE, ERODE & SALEM STATIONS?! The killing is definitely OUT OF THEIR JURISDICTION! What about the hundreds of other travellers who save their skins by the skin of their teeth, fighting the Evil Auto Wallahs (Auto Drivers) and the Anti Social Elements, SOMEHOW REACH THEIR DESTINATIONS, AT UNSAFE HOURS, AFTER ALIGHTING FROM THEIR SAFE-HOURLY SCHEDULED TRAINS?! Is there anybody RESPONSIBLE for all these things? "A VERY BIG NO" is the INDIAN ANSWER to this STUPID QUESTION!!!

'The Monsoon was Termed a Killer' as the poor man around his YOUTHFUL SIXTY coming after his duty in the night, around 7.30pm, on his scooter, at the Whirl Wind Speed of 30-40 Kilometres an Hour, fell into a water filled trench which was full of water due to Monsoon, and got drowned! The extremely intelligent police (PINPOINTEDLY & HAIR-SPLITTINGLY ACCURATELY!) suspected that he might have LOST CONTROL of his vehicle (Who Might Not Have Lost Control When One Is Riding A Scooter In A Monsoon Season At A Speed of 30-40 Kilometre an Hour and is Aged 60?!) after slipping on the mud removed from the pit and fallen into the water logged drain! Though the Well Efficient Bruhat Bangalore Mahanagara Palike (BBMP)’s “SIMPLE NEGLIGENCE" was there, as it was the BBMP which had dug the trench and left it uncovered, it was the Monsoon which is and is to be blamed for the murder, as it is the Monsoon which filled the uncovered trench with water that caused the death! The lost life was mourned by the bereaved family as the open trench was kept / remained open, waiting for other hapless victims!

The police nabbed the persons who killed the merchant, in a couple of days after the murder, and PROVED THEIR EFFICIENCY & SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY; they also got the better off the gang, which stole bikes regularly from the metro and sold creating fake documents for years; though these people were known to have stolen hundreds of bikes, only five were recovered by the police; and the owners were yet to come forward! EVERYONE IS PROUD OF & IMPRESSED BY THE EFFICIENCY & SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY OF OUR POLICE! But this same efficient police failed to nab the culprit who stole the THIRUVABHARANAM (DIVINE ORNAMENT!) from a very famous temple, in South India; they also failed to find who stole the MAIN IDOL from another famous temple, in South India! In the last two cases the ALL EFFICIENT POLICE FAILED ONLY BECAUSE IF THEY NABBED A PERSON BLAMING THAT THE PARTICULAR PERSON STOLE ONE OF THE TWO OBJECTS JUST MENTIONED ABOVE, THEY HAD TO RECOVER THE STATED THING, WHICH IS POSSIBLE ONLY WHEN THE STOLEN OBJECT IS CAPTURED FROM THE STEALER! And, one has to remember that IN THE CASE OF MURDER IT IS NOT NECESSARY THAT THE DEAD PERSON IDENTIFY HIS OR HER KILLER, AS DEAD BODIES SELDOM SPEAK! Hence, EFFICIENCY & SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY IS HEAVILY DEPENDENT ON CERTAIN CRIMES ONLY!! Oh What An EFFICIENCY & SENSE OF RESPONSIBILITY!!

When he bought the cola from the shop little did he think that it will be an advertisement for Family Planning! When he uncorked the bottle and had a couple of sips from the all energising drink he never even dreamed that the next thing which will come near his lips would be something which is seen in totally different terrains! To his shock he found a "CONDOM" in his Energy Drink! "What a Cool Idea!", "What Creativity!", "Really Wonderful Experience!".....All these things he never thought! He felt like vomiting! He Never Suspected that Ad Guys Had Gone This Innovative! "May be this ad is targeting cola drinking youth!", some one suggested! "It is ‘For A Cola A Condom Free’ Marketing Strategy!” commented another expert! He wondered if all these sayings are true, why should he have PURE DIRT in the bottom of the second bottle of cola he purchased!?! The company must have acknowledged that it was a Simple Mistake from their part or an accident, as IT IS FROM CONDOMS & DIRT COLAS ARE MADE; forget about the TOXIC ITEMS AUTHORITIES FOUND & UNFOUND IN THE EARLIER VERSIONS OF COLAS!

It took only 22 years to get “a Finished Verdict” in that particular case, where his neighbour encroached upon 5 feet of his land, next to the Mango Tree, near his kitchen! He started the legal battle to get justice when his only son was just born; as he didn’t have enough money to fight legally against his wealthy neighbour who encroached upon his land, he borrowed money from a money lender and started his battle against the injustice & hooliganism done against him! Little did he expect that what would be ensuing would be something which would last till his son grew up to finish his Master’s in Chemistry and something which would put him back by SOME LAKHS OF INDIAN CURRENCY! But, before all these things came The Stay Order, which proclaimed that STATUS QUO should be maintained on the DISPUTED TERRITORY, which literally made HIS OWN LAND INACCESSIBLE TO HIM FOR A LOT OF YEARS TO COME! The case got postponed or extended for one reason or the other for a lot of years and then it went, at regular intervals, from one court to the higher ones! He was relieved when he got the Final Judgement in 22 years, when there were thousands of cases pending, even after 25 or 30 years of fierce legal battles; he also learned happily that he got his Final Judgement, when there were MORE THAN 3 CRORES OF CASES PENDING in various courts, all over India! He learned that there were cases, thousands of them, which were closed when the parties who were contesting passed away due to illness related to old age and some cases got settled out of the court as the non-existent members of the warring parties, who were not there when the cases began, took birth, grew up, fell in love and got married to each other! Though he was relieved, he thought whether the saying “Justice delayed Is Justice denied!” is significant in India or not, as it seemed EVEN JUSTICE DELAYED BY DECADES SEEMED RESPONSIBILTY & EFFICIENCY PERSONIFIED, IN INDIA!

With the strength of the medical policy his company had given him, he got himself admitted to a very famous hospital which was on the list of hospitals recommended by his medical policy, when he failed to stop dysentery, most probably due to food poisoning! They had checks & re-checks & re-rechecks that they identify the problem! They asked him to keep himself there for further tests and elongate his stay there that they help him out of his problem; as it was the policy which was footing the bill he obeyed obediently! The doctor, after a couple of days, told him that he suspected the BAAL TB (TB affecting children) HE HAD BEFORE THE AGE OF FIVE might be creating problems, though now he was 28! The doctor asked for some more tests that he could be 100% sure what this BAAL TB was doing there! After 15 days' of tests, re tests, analysis and all other sorts of things he exited from the hospital, relived of his illness, re assured by the doctor that he had no traces of BAAL TB he had when he was barely five years old, emaciated but with a strong will to fight BAAL TB if it comes back, with his policy footing the 40000/- hospital bill! As advised by the doctor he took a 15 day rest, as well, to rejuvenate himself! But, when he returned to his company it was not interested in him, as he had more than one month's absence to his credit! Citing the weight loss, though he weighed more than what he weighed when he joined the company for the first time, he was kept out of work & pay, which made him quit the job with no alternate option! Anyway, he was thankful to the GOOD DOCTOR, who PAINSTAKINGLY SPENT 15 DAYS FOR HIM to ascertain that there were no traces of BAAL TB in him!!!

We, in India, have an extremely large number of persons, teachers, psephologists, astrologists, institutions, departments, companies, stores, hospitals, universities, governments & what not, which do certain things (most of the things!) which SPOIL or DESTROY EDUCATION, CAREER, HEALTH, WEALTH, ENVIRONMENT, LIFE, THE FUTURE OF THE HUMAN PERSON and what not with never having any responsibility and do whatever they like with impunity! No one or nobody is ever held responsible for the sorts of above mentioned acts of crime, as all these crimes against human beings are seen and considered in lighter vein! They seldom get mentioned; and if mentioned at all, the perpetrators will escape with little damage to their person or status and KEEP DOING WHAT THEY ALL HAVE BEEN "DOING IRRESPONSIBLY" ALL THESE YEARS! LET US BUILD OR KEEP BUILDING A THOROUGHLY IRRESPONSIBLE INDIA! LET’S CONTRIBUTE OUR MITE TO THE BUILDING OF A MIGHTY IRRESPONSIBLE INDIA!